After A Sibling Sacrafice
by Lialioya
Summary: Rue's family, especially her little sister took her death hard. It was a living nightmare for those who were close to the little girl, and they start thinking about life without her. When Katniss and Peeta arrive at district eleven after the hunger games, it pushes them over the edge. Rated for suicide, One-Shot, and really angsty.


**Disclaimer: I don't own anything, not Katniss Peeta, anyone at all. Just trying to have some fun and write a story.**

**Please review and tell me what you think!**

**~Lialioya**

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Standing in the middle of a crowd, I have never felt so alone.

Even though this is supposed to be a celebration, even I can tell that everyone is forcing a smile. How are we supposed to smile, knowing that people from our district are dead? Knowing that come next year there most likely two people will join their fate?

It's impossible.

I still remember that day. the day when my sister died. Twelve years old, forced to be in a murderous game where she is only entertainment. Nothing of worth. Unmemorable. Disposable.

One more year, then maybe I will share her fate. In the seventy fourth Hunger Games, my sister Rue died a bloody and slow death. Will I as well?

Is there any way to stop it?

Any way to win?

The answer is no.

No one wins, even if you're the last one standing.

The capital wins.

How could you live with yourself knowing that you got where you are because you have killed other children so some adults can have something to watch? How can you feel good about yourself when these thoughts are swirling in your head?

The answer is you can't.

I swayed a bit as these dreadful thoughts went through my head. The winners from district twelve have come to celebrate their winning by going to every district.

It makes me sick.

It's like the final slap in the face.

It's like the capitol is saying, "First we take two of your children, now you have to watch their murderers go around and celebrate that they did this, and eat your food."

Is it wrong I hate it?

I study the winners. Katniss Everdeen, the victor from district twelve, standing there, looking at me with pity in her eyes as she holds her lovers hand.

I don't want her pity.

I wanted her to save Rue.

I want my sister.

I need my sister.

The world swirled as I silently grieved for my poor, lost sisters soul. Where is she now? Hopefully as far away from these horrible people as possible. I couldn't stand it if she could see what was happening now. Would she be mad at these victors?

I am.

I remembered her perfect curly brown hair, and how she moved gracefully and swiftly, as if she was one with the mockingjays above her head. Her voice was beautiful, and I remember her being there for me when I was crying over my bruises after my recent beatings. I remember her holding me close as I had to watch people be murdered on live television.

I remember when I saw her die on live television.

It was the worst day of my life.

I stood, exhausted from another day with the sun mercilessly beating on my back, as if the capitol had tan that over too, and was forcing it to torture us. Yet I wouldn't miss this time for the world. I needed to see my Rue. I needed to see if she was alive.

She wasn't.

The world slowed as I saw the boy throw the spear. It happened in a heartbeat but that heartbeat was forever. She turned, her eyes going wide, but couldn't move. The spear embedded itself in her, and I could see it on the other side of the head.

My mouth opened in a silent scream and I felt like I was about to die. My mother tried to calm me down, but it was no use. I curled my fists as if to rage, but even anger left me. I was numb. Frozen. Gone.

Just like she was.

Would I ever be the same?

The answer I wouldn't.

Now as she looked away, Katniss, she looked to another. The one that held up the respect symbol.

The rest of the crowd took up the call, raising our hand to the victors.

After all, Katniss did love Rue. Not as much as I did, but enough to whip out her bow and shoot the person who killed my sister. My brave sister, who was now dead.

This brave girl in front of me, I realized that Rue would bot hate her, so I shouldn't.

I remember the wreath of flowers that Katniss put around my dear sisters head, how she sang to her, protected her, but it wasn't enough.

I still raised my hand.

She was taken aback, but I saw a flicker of happiness and sadness. Remembering a girl who was unmemorable.

The moment ended, and the victors were shoved off the stage as the man who started it was hauled on the stage.

His skull went flying off his head as the peacekeepers shot him in the head. I gasped and stumbled back, my dress tripping me so I bumped into an ashen-faced women. The guards were trying to calm the now frantic crowd. I was dazed and confused, looking at the man's blood on my shirt, but I knew what to do.

I ran from the crowd, ran from my family calling my name.

I went into my house, and ran straight to the room that me and Rue used to share.

I spun around, looking at her side of the room. It was nice and neat, with various nick-knacks that she collected when we walked through the fields at night when we wanted a quick escape of this horrible life, pretending everything was fine. That we were just two little girls in an okay world that wasn't riddled with horrors and death as a part of everyday life.

I picked up a grass doll I made her. I smiled a bit, remembering how her face lit up at the gift, and I hosted the best feeling in this entire horrible world.

I sat on her bed and started to cry. I wiped away the dust that had settled over everything she owned. She couldn't be gone. Yet she was.

I had gotten up many times in the period she has been gone, forgetting that she wasn't there to help me battle my nightmares.

I would roll over, and walk to her bed, her name almost at my lips before I realized she wasn't there.

She would never be back.

The tears blurred my eyes and I rubbed my nose messily. I remembered our stupid arguments about who's turn it was to clean the room. I remember how we always used to end them by tickling each other, and chasing each other around the house. All the rest of our siblings were too young to play with, and she never denied me a game.

I sobbed openly, hugging myself, wanting her to wrap her slender and graceful arms around me.

There would be no memorial for Rue. There will be no parade. The only sadness that the capitol would feel would be if they lost a bet on how long she would live.

She was Worthless to them. Unmemorable. Disposable.

She meant the world to me.

Then my world was gone.

My world is dead.

But who cares about a tiny eleven-year-old in district eleven? I am Worthless. Unmemorable. Disposable.

I grabbed the knife that I had been using to cut myself since she had been gone. I was ready to end my life, because the only thing that could possibly comfort me then was to leave this horrid place and see her.

My world.

How could I go on living knowing that my loving, beautiful full of life sister wasn't with me?

The answer was I couldn't.

I hardly felt a thing, just a bit drained and happy. I smiled slightly, tears still fresh on my cheeks as I looked down at the knife embedded deep in my heart that had broke long before I stabbed it.

I am going to see my world.

I could almost see her face, full of love and kindness in front of me.

"Hello, Rue," I whispered dreamily. I watched as blood pooled around the sheets, turning them from grey to red.

I slumped on the bed, and left the world to go see my sister, which in my opinion was the only reason here was to live, but once she was gone, there wasn't a reason.

I saw her, and my mouth turned up into a massive smile, one that I hadn't done since the last time I saw her. She reached for me, waiting for me to return her embrace.

I left my body behind, a small price to pay to see her again.

I left that world and instead wrapped my arms around mine.


End file.
